You are not
can not
will not
be
this dream I
built inside

And though my soul
Cries out for you
my mind
denies the chase

I refuse to touch you
to hold you
to kiss you
though I would
move the earth
to do so

A gleaming serpent,
ancient old,
hides behind your
smile

Deceiving, subduing
making me see
what I want to
believe

I resist with
all my will
yet still
I slide toward
you

And forward you move
and somehow we touch,
but fate intervenes
comes between
a mistake I'd love
to make

An so, though a host
of Angels weep for
my longing, a thousand
glittering voices lifted up
in mourning of my self denial
I remain an island
for my safety, and my heart,
already bound up a thousand
times, no more scars I crave

For, as long as she plays in
her world of toys, as long as
she desires what is no more
than skin deep, I will shun
her. But when she finds
her soul, when she remembers
herself, then may I let myself
go, and then may I be with her.

                        AcB         7.14.98